so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
So much rum. So many feels.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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