Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
