We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
