Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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