You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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