If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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