I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
