You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
I think i peed on brittanys purse
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
What drink are we having for lunch?
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Randomize
