Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize
