What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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