? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
