Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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