i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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