Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I need a hoe opinion
go on
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
