Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
