dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
