Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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