Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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