Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Randomize