Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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