ugly people sure do ruin things
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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