what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
