10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
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