My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
