my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
