He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
