There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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