is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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