have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize