I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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