If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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