Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I think I am morally bankrupt
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
