Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Its about making memories worth repressing
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Randomize