I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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