and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
