dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
