Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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