Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Randomize