all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
PANTIES FOUND
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
