Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
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