if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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