Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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