i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I'm both gender and math confused
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
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