I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Two words: blizzard sex
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
