Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
