What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Randomize
