What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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