I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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