I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
