You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Randomize
